


how to see in the dark

by ferris



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: M/M, actualheichou, eruri - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-30
Updated: 2013-12-30
Packaged: 2018-01-06 17:21:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1109497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ferris/pseuds/ferris
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>a series of vignettes. <br/>soldiers and lovers only exist within the sleepless.</p>
            </blockquote>





	how to see in the dark

_lesson 1; rise early_

it’s difficult to catch erwin sleeping. the blond man rises the earliest in the mornings and goes to bed only long after the lights go out. the man’s circadian rhythms are so distorted that it is frustrating to make sense of the commander’s bodily functions at all. 

levi makes it a point to get up early at least one day a week, or perhaps forgo a night of sleep entirely, to catch his commander sleeping, at his desk, vulnerable, relaxed. he then proceeds to drape a coat around the blond man and maybe leave a cup of coffee on the table if it’s close enough to dawn.

_lesson 2; sleep like four o’ clocks_

soldiers never sleep. even when their eyes are closed, lying in bed, completely still, they do not sleep. their shut-eye is only a replaying of the day’s nightmares, the horrors of the past, a constant torment. bleakness. that’s the only thing these reluctant heroes see.  

soldiers only sleep when they are dead. 

_lesson 3; keep one eye open_

there is always the feeling of paranoia within the walls, and those who do not feel it only feel the way they do because they are so used to the constant fear striking at their hearts. often levi lays awake on his bed, staring up at the ceiling, unable to close his eyes although his muscles are relaxed and his mind desperately screams for him to sleep. he can feel it, he can see it in his mind’s eye: teeth gnashing, hands grasping, the monstrous pound of giant feet against the earth. 

only when erwin passes by his room - and backtracks when he sees the lamp still lit - does levi feel like he’s able to close his eyes for a few hours. the commander looks even more tired than levi feels; eventually they sit side by side, nursing cups of coffee, gloomily noting the day’s events and foreseeing the future’s. 

when levi blows out the flame, he can still see the imprints of erwin’s profile, burned into his retinas, and the few glowing circles he hallucinates, he likes to pretend are the souls of the dearly departed. 


End file.
